Today, Josh asked me to sign his homework-- just sign and not look over. Pherry asked me to finish the note his Biology teacher asked parents to write about their kids. Over dinner, KC told us how her former principal who lived to her new school introduced her to the school guidance counsellor. " This is Karmina, she will be a phenomenal addition to our school." She said she was so embarrassed. I told her she was all that and more!
I don't know what to do now. The kids are growing so fast and its pretty sad. I feel they are overly independent now. I feel i am being set aside. Really?
I know this is bound to happen.
I know kids think this feeling is absurd.
I know every parents feel this way.
I know it's too early to feel the "empty nest" syndrome.
I know there are more important things than my silly feelings.
I know i'll always have them only not as my little angels.
I know they would still call me Mama no matter what age.
I know soon they will have their own lives.
I know, i know. I know many things but when it comes to the kids, i know nothing. The more i know, the more i realize i know nothing.
Just when i thought i figured out adolescence angst, theres more coming.
Just when i thought i perfected scheduling there's more to add.
Just when i thought i gave all life's lectures, there's more to talk about.
Just when i thought i bought everything needed and wanted , its out of fashion.
Just when i thought i am the coolest mom, they don't want to be friends with me.
Just when i thought i'm saying the correct teen lingo, there's something new.
Just when i thought i have taught them personal hygiene, it's forgotten.
Just when i thought my hugs and kisses cures them all, they push away.
Just when i thought I'm done cooking for them, they grow too fast the fridge is always empty.
Just when i thought i have indulged in their interests, they move on to new ones.
Just when i thought i boosted their confidence someone puts them down.
Jut when i thought i make them real Catholics, i read notes about exploring atheism.
Jut when i thought they are independent, they recede back to mommy-do-this-and-that.
Just when i thought i got a balance between life and mommy duties, disaster strikes.
Just when i thought we have come to an agreement they make up a truce.
Yes, there's more. There's more i don't know. I know that.
I guess that's why my home is full of out family pictures. That's intentional. I don't care about proper home decoration rules. All i know is i want my home to be a reflection of my family. I want to be reminded of what i have. My family! I Don't have much but i know i have my family. That's all that matters!
These are my fave spots in the house. You can tell these are corners with my kids' pictures. My fear is that these will be the only ones i have when they all have their own lives! Oh sigh!
My kiddos, when you read this in the future, just know i love you and i want you to be around me forever but i also know you will be great kids even without me! I trust you!
Mwaaah!
